Sunday, December 27, 2009
Growing Up
i fell that as i have gotten older the magic and just pure beautifulness that makes holidays that special time of year has just sorta... died. i still love holidays. but i mostly love the idea of holidays. ya no? like holidays just seem like anyother time of year i just spend more moneyget to open a few boxs and drive far away to see family i do not really know. i hope to find the innocence in me that will make holidays special once again. but i wonder if wont come till i am old and married and have kids who will make that holiday magical. yup. birthdays are the same way. or maybe i just need to go to something compleatly fun this year for my birthday. drive to kings island or something... who knows. auctually my birthday present to myself this year is my $1,666 plane ticket to france. dang i hate money. but i couldn't pass up frence! could you? no i didn't think so. looks like no car for me. which means no life or fun or freedom or... happiness. haha that was silly. stupid cars. and boys. and people. i am sounding a lil bitter aren't i? well it is late... and when it late i ramble just like this. stupid money... and CIY it is a church camp sorta thing. i am supposed to go. i told jamie i would. but i leave for france the daythey get home from ciy sooo really what am i supposed to do? give up france so i can go to ciy? i am afraid i just might not be willing to make that scrafice... sorryGod... maybe i should like pray about it and like see what he wants me to do. but what if he gives me the answer i do not want! ha ha he has been known to do that. who knows! maybe if Kyndrick would be happpy for me for getting the chance to go to france instead of being upset i am leaving him? humm...it doesn't matter. it will all work out. it will. i am tired i need to sleep. anyone need to get rid of a car... for free? just let me no. i am willing to take it off your hands.
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7 comments:
oh ... i am sorry you have to miss all those stuffs. but i promise it'll be awesome :)
I was thinking that I was happy for you this Christmas because you usually get so excited beforehand that it's a complete let down. And this year you didn't do that to yourself. So, really, it was good in that way. Your dedication to your family in Anderson is something I admire about you Stephanie. It's hard for you I know, but the fact that you do it anyway shows that you are a young lady of substance. You have to admit that it was pretty magical the way your corduroy pants fit so nicely. Not having a car allows you to be free of that burden for a while, enjoy it. You have a nice Mom who shares her car with you whenever you need it. I love you.
Oh and one more thing.... I love the honesty of your writing.
I agree about the holidays... it is quite sad, isn't it. Like next year I have to work Christmas, and really, I don't think it is that bad. Reallllly? I should be furious. O well. And FRANCE! Do not miss the opportunity! Kyn will have to survive without you.
no i will not miss france! i am going! and i will get back to america three days before school starts! hahahahahaz oh well i just better buy myself soemthing frekin sweet this time.
I really AM happey for you Steph.. I'm sorry that i am a little sad that you are leavin. That is all. I am just a little sad. I hope you have an incredible time and have funn and meet sweet Parisians. I really do not want you to miss this opportunity. I know that you will have lots of fun. Anyway tori is right. I will definately, hopefully, be able to survive without you for a while. I hope so at least!
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